scatteredbondpapers

Friday, June 09, 2006

kolejiyo
[ika-apat]

madami akong kwento sa kolege life ko. medyo mahaba ito.


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college showed me a plethora of insights and gave me a manifold view about the reality i must face.
mahirap mang aminin pero totoong ibang-iba ang college sa h.s. hindi mabilang ang mga late ko sa basic math namin every friday kasi 7:00am ang klase, masyadong maaga para sa tamad kong umaga. ayun, ang madaling subject may mababang grade sa class card.

wala akong masyadong pinlano nung college, basta ang alam ko dapat matapos ko ang course ko na Bachelor in Secondary Education Major in English. Wala sa dream ko na maging teacher, per dahil wala kaming pera para sa pangarap kong abogasya, kembot na ang eduk. konti lang yung pakonswelo ko: luv ko ang subject na english kaya hindi ko na kaylangang i-tapped yung interest level ko, at si rea rose ay kaklase ko, ibig sabihin hindi ako magiisa sa pers day of iskul, jahe kasi pag solo flight ka. oo nga pala, haging ko nang makalimutang marami sa barkadahan namin ang dun din sa iskul na yun nagaaral kaya parang extension lang yun ng b.a.(dating iskul)

weird ang pers day, hinanap namin ni rea yung rum namin for the subject, ang nakalagay L3. wala kaming idea kung ano yung "L" may L pala sa COEd. hehe. it turned out na yung "L" pala ay lobby, lobby 3 inakyat namin yun, at boom! yung parang bakanteng lote(ngayon may dingding na) ay may isang lupong upuang bakal. dun ang unang rum, na hindi mukhang rum kami unang nagklase. masaya naman, pakilalanan (ano pa ba) "please introduce yourself." sabi nung math prof, "hi, my name's *h*r*l*s, and i am an introvert." ano daw????!!!!???? hindi ko napigilang kagatin ang labi ko para hindi natawa...sama ko noh.

anyway, si rea ay madalas kong kasama, dahil kami talaga ang berks sa klase, pero after a while join the club si eila at si ice sa aming grupo so apat na kami. apat na masasamang mahilig mangatay ng mga kaklase. super katay talaga. hehe.

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"And you kissed me like you meant it.
And I knew...that you meant it.

"she who must not be named" ay ewan pero in sort of way, parang unag girl ko. hindi ko alam kung yung nga yung tamang tawag, dahil maski ako nanghuhula lang kung ano ba talaga yung meron sa "aming" dalawa. anyway, i didn't know where it started, maybe i was dumb, but the moment was just fleeting as the fireflies in autumn (na ngayon ay kasing dalang ng blue moon). hindi ko namalayang masarap s'yang kasama (kahit madalas bad s'ya towards other people). anyway, we were happy, she's pretty and cute, and as i've said fun to be with (o join na ako sa immortal quote ni shakespeare na: Love is blind for lovers don't seem the follies they commit)
pero ang alam ko ay masaya ako, and i wanted to make the moment lasts--- but it didn't! So much for my happy ending. Outside the windows go our passionate kisses, embraces, and all the sorts of things we've been through. shet! it was so real, it was so good, to good to last. i thought all along that i found someone whom i can be with, but hell i was wrong. ouch!!! anyway, tapos na yun.

all you have to do is go on with your life, it's not a matter of how many times you stumbled, it's matter of how many times you pick yourself up. after some 1.5's and 1.75's and 2.0's (grades) school must go on. nung first year and second year, ang average grade ko ay 1.60, masaya na ako dun, lalo pa't hindi naman ako masyadong nag-aaral, at madalas pa akong late at cutting. hehe. misan binalak ko na ring pataasin yung grade ko at humabol para maging cum laude, pero mukhang hindi ko talaga interes yung mga awards awards na yan. lagot ako sa parents ko. hehe.

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"...you're just the best i ever had."

after some heartbreaks and heartaches, na ako rin naman ang nagdala sa sarili ko, i finally found her. yehey!

medyo pang pelikula yung story naman; pwede rin namang pang music video na savage garden, yung kantang i knew i love you... baduy ba? basta ako kiber sa idea mo... (taray) anyway balik tayo, nung fourth year h.s. kami, syempre nag-apply kami for college, sa UP sana ako mag-aaral, kaso ayaw ng mami, magulo daw dun. (hindi naman eh) so syempre sa pinakamalapit na unibersidad ako join. BulSU, sinabi ko na yung course ko sa isang artik di
ba? okay. applyan, ang haba na queue (binabasa ng ganito: kyü) papuntang registrar's office. nakakainip. buti na lang may maganda sa harap ko. yung girl na hindi ko kilala, na nagaaply din kasama ng barkada nya. maganda talaga s'ya, nalolokohan pa nga kaming ng mga barkada ko kung sino ang magiging boyfrend nya mula sa amin, hindi ako nagpatalo sabi ko "magiging girlfriend ko yan." torpe kaming lahat kaya wala kaming lakas ng loob na makipagkilala, nakita ko lang sa key chain na galing baguio sa bag nya na ang name n'ya ay eliza, so yun, yun ang tanging nalaman ko. torpe noh. anyway after nung incident na yun, isang beses ko na lang ulit sya nakita sa process ng pag-aaply sa BulSu, this time it's worse dahil may kasama s'yang guy, na akala ko ay boyfriend nya (kuya pala).

nawala na sa isip ko si eliza, dahil h.s. pa lang ako nun at hindi ko naman talaga s'ya kilala (sounding like "dear ate charo"). anyway, back to college. there was this one time kasi that i was outside our room because our teacher wasn't anywhere near the room (conio naman ngayon. hehe). bigla may nakita akong pamilyar na mukha na naglalakad papunta sa aking dereksyon (feeling pogi) s'ya yun! pero lagpas. lagpas. hindi pala s'ya sa akin papunta kundi sa room nila. ngek! medyo pahiya pa ako. medyo lang. pagtalikod ko may dumarating na isang pang aparisyon, si jongz pala klasmeyt ko nung h.s., barkada ni rea, in short barkada ko rin. "s'ya yun oh" sabay turo sa direksyon ni eliza. "ahh, si eliza, klasmeyt ko yun. gusto mo kunin ko yung number?" sasabihin ko sanang "ako na." kaya lang naalala kong wala pa nga pala akong cellphone nung time na yun, "go. get it girl."

nakuha n'ya yung number. okay. ang problema, WALA AKONG TELEPONO!!! buti na lang at marami akong supporting frends, lagi akong pinapahiram. hehe. tenk you!!! so text ako, lousy pa nga yung unang text message ko sabi ko

"hi. this is paul. wla lng sbi kc ni jongz txt kita eh."

engot ko talaga. buti na lang nagreply. okay yun na yun. ligaw ako. kasama sa panliligaw ko yung paghatid sa kanya which means na hindi ko pinapasukan yung iba kong subject, madalas "Linguistics" major subject yun. astig.

after some time. kami na. hehe. lousy rin yung way ng pagtatanong ko kung kami na ba... wag kang umasa hindi ko sasabihin, pero it's for sure hindi pampelikula. as in.

we've been together ever since. nung una magulo, madalas magaway (super ayaw as in gyera. promise.) pero nung nag mature na yung realtionship. oks na. pero nagaaway pa rin kami sometimes.

nagkatotoo yung sinabi ko nung h.s. diba... galing...

i love you bey.

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"mentor's journal
official publication of the students of the bulacan state university, college of education."

wala akong alam sa pagsusulat ng balita o ng kahit na anong artik, dahil yung school organ nung h.s. na dapat sana ay magmamaterialize, hindi nagkatotoo. anyway, sinubukan kong magjoin the club sa mentor's nung muli itong binuksan, si rossem ang aming ed-in-chief, bullet ang assoc, mark man ed., lon finance (bakit ko nga ba binaggit eh hindi nyo naman sila kilala, hehe). ayun, una kong assignment ay gumawa ng balita tungkol sa renovation ng bldg. ng eduk. pers time kong mapasok sa opis ng dean namin, ayun interview galore. after ng mahabang proseso natapos ko ang artik, at naprint ang newsletter, banner news yung artik ko, hindi ako sigurado kung talaga bang maganda yung artik ko o dahil yun yung pasok sa elements. after more writings, interviews, research, nagtake ako at si ice ng exam para maging editor. good news naman at naging editor ako (feature). dagdag trabaho, dagdag saya.

ang pinakamasaya sa lahat ng moments ko sa mentor's at isa sa pinakamasasayang moment sa buhay ko ay nung nagpunta kami sa baguio for the 3rd higher education press conference. pers time ko sa baguio ang masaya pa, walang mahigpit na rules na dapat sundin basta dapat lang ay mag ingat ka sa lahat ng gagawin mo. dito ko naexperience ang usok pag nagsasalita (cute), ang mamulto, ang mag taxi 12 times a day, maglakad sa session road, mamasyal sa gabi, maligo without heater, gumawa ng korni jokes about wagwagan and ukay-ukay. kulang talaga yung mga salita para sa experience ko sa baguio. the best. affliated ako sa mentor's hanggang nung grumadweyt ako ng kolege.

fourth year ang pinaka challenging sa lahat ng years sa college. Student Teacher na ako (Practicum sa matatanda) sa isang public skul sa Paombon, Bulacan. actually hindi naman talaga ako dun na-assign, una sa Assumpta academy pero ayaw nila, so nagpalipat ako sa holy sa sta. isabel, malolos (ang holy ay itinuturing na isa sa pinakamaganda at pinakamahal na iskul sa malolos) catholic skul na dati ay all girls skul lang, promise ang daming magagandang estude (may pampaganda kasi). pero dahil wala akong ginagawa kundi magmukhang tanga sa likod na upuan sa rum, nagpalipat ako sa public school. so yun, pagtapos sa pangmayamang iskul, bumulaga sa akin ang iskul na hindi mukhang iskul. culture shock ako, elem-h.s. private iskul ako; wala ako kahit isang idea na ganto sa public. it was the first time that i came to realize the real condition of the education in the country. it has become a priviledge for those who
can afford instead of a right that everyone deserves. tapos nagtataka pa ang DepEd kung bakit bumubulusok ang educational rating ng pilipinas. c'mon!

difficult ang naging experience ko sa public school pero at the same time, yun ang eye opener ko and after that parang lahat ng klase ng estude kayang-kaya ko nang i-handle. after that, i've decided, i'm going to be a teacher. and i did! i finished the four year course.

as i've said fourth year was the toughest year i had, i was juggling plenty of responsibilities in school, writer ako sa college paper, student teacher, class president (bakit nga ba ako binoto nung mga yun), director sa play namin sa course na play production. ang lupet nung play namin. we staged "the anatomy of the passionate derangement" ni eric gamalinda. one of the best plays i've ever read, the other one is "last order sa penguin" by cris martinez. dalawa lang kaming lalaki sa play, eh yung main characters 2 guys who has a romantic relationship of some sort. ang hirap nung process to come up with a good play, but we did it, we were awarded first place. ang saya after that. pero walang time for a celebration kasi nagpunta kami sa bahay nung klasmeyt namin, pumanaw na kasi yung tatay nya, so after pack-up, fly kami sa kanila.

after the final exam, next na yung graduation na pinakahihintay namin. pakshet nga nung graduation na. ang bigat na nung dibdib ko dahil sa lungkot at saya na nararamdaman ko pero hindi ako maiyak kahit anong pilit ko. sakit sa tyan. it's official, graduate na kami!! yehey!!

hehe... hindi ako naging cum laude tulad ng inaasahan ko dahil unang-una eh hindi ko naman talaga pinlano. pero 1.80 ang average ko. kulang ng .05 points para maging cum laude ako. huli na nang maisip kong kung inayos ko yung final test ko sa basic math nung first year at kung nagpapasok ako sa linguistics malamang sa cum laude ako. hehe... anyway, graduate pa rin ako at pogi pa rin ako...

lakas!!!

4 Comments:

Blogger bullet said...

Hey! Regarding the "play" thing first of all there was never an awarding for best anything in play and most definitely not ever was there a best play. But I do agree your group's was the best play.

However, there is the question of the "best play" and the "best stagingi of a play." 'Passionate Derangement...' is indeed a brilliant play, a black comedy which brings you sad comfort. Lighter it was than my group's 'Fiesta', which is not to say that mine is not good play but it is too melodramatic and hard. Its just too damn hard. But if youve payed attention to the readings we were given in class for that subject there were other aspects to a good play than just a good script. You've also got to look at the stage setting with all the props in it, the music, and the actors. Speaking of actors, I dont mean to disrespect but the characters were just too plain easy on your play yet the actors were self-conscious for the portrayal.

But its too far back in time now to be argued about. And its immaterial bevause we got the grade the professor wanted to give us not what we deserve anyway. I just wanted to share a piece of my mind. And say that ours was the best play. wehehe.

11:15 PM  
Blogger scatteredbondpapers said...

of course you are just being the bitter ocampo, in your comment. wehehe.

with regard to the "staging" that you are talking about, i think the audience speaks for it. yes, i'd paid a great deal of attention as to the factors of that will make a good play, and not only add those in our play, but also, created some new ways to further enhance its quality.

anyway, i do believe that props, music, and the actors, really "add up" to the splendor of a play, but the main goals of a play are to entertain and express the idea that the playwright wanted to express. there's no question that your group's props are of top quality, and some of your actors' portrayal of the role is great, but you failed to ignite the audience and in our case, the professor.

we are sorry, but we are "passionately derange" in our play that we forgot it's "fiesta."

buharharhar :-)

11:13 PM  
Blogger bullet said...

Oh but there you make a mistake my friend!

Two mistakes actually: one is to wrong me with a malicious accusation of being the Bitter One by expressing my Oh-so-valid comment and two, which I must say, is more deranged is to put the art of theater to the low point of being something that is there for the "main goals of [entertaining] and express the idea [of] the playwright"

But lets not even talk about the personal insult you've dealt, lets focus on the comment to art.

Wait! Wait! I'll give you time to mull it over first. I'm gonna post my angst next time.

3:01 PM  
Blogger scatteredbondpapers said...

haha :-)

6:27 PM  

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